Four Years Later: What Grief Has Taught Me About Leadership, Service, and the Holidays
Four years ago this week, I lost my dad.
That sentence still carries weight. Not because time hasn’t passed—but because grief doesn’t move on a tidy schedule. It reshapes you. It settles into quiet corners of your life. And during the holidays, it often rises to the surface again.
As a son, I feel that deeply.
As a coach, speaker, and author serving families impacted by disability, educators, and nonprofit leaders, I also see this truth up close:
Unprocessed grief does not stay personal—it becomes communal.
It shows up in:
Burnout
Disconnection
Compassion fatigue
Decision overload
Quiet disengagement
And during the holidays, when expectations rise and emotional bandwidth drops, those impacts intensify.
The Myth of “Being Strong”
Many leaders silently carry this belief:
“I don’t have time to grieve.”
“My staff needs me.”
“My students need me.”
“My family needs me.”
So we push forward.
We stay productive.
We keep serving.
But grief doesn’t wait for convenient timing. It waits quietly… until it doesn’t.
Losing my dad forced me to confront this reality:
Strength is not pretending you’re okay. Strength is telling the truth about what hurts—and choosing to keep walking anyway.
Why I Wrote I’MPOSSIBLE JOURNEY
I’MPOSSIBLE JOURNEY: Finding Treasure in the Midst of Grief was not written from a place of having all the answers.
It was written from:
Hospital hallways
Quiet drives home
Journals full of unanswered questions
And mornings when getting out of bed felt like a victory
I didn’t write it to explain grief.
I wrote it to walk with it—and to offer others permission to do the same.
Today, this book is being used as:
A grief reflection guide for families
A staff wellness resource
A leadership development tool
A support companion for neurodiverse individuals
A training lens for educators and nonprofit teams
Because grief doesn’t just impact individuals—it impacts culture.
What Grief Teaches Us About the People We Serve
If you work in:
Education
Disability services
Nonprofit leadership
Healthcare
Ministry
Community organizations
You don’t just serve needs.
You serve stories.
And many of those stories include:
Loss of loved ones
Loss of health
Loss of independence
Loss of identity
Loss of what life was supposed to be
During the holidays, those losses often feel louder.
Here’s what grief has taught me:
People don’t need fixing first. They need to be seen first.
They don’t need solutions before safety.
They don’t need pressure to feel joyful.
They need permission to be human.
What Grief-Aware Leadership Looks Like
Grief-aware leadership sounds like:
“You don’t have to explain everything.”
“It’s okay to slow down.”
“You’re not behind—you’re healing.”
It looks like:
Flexible expectations
Emotional check-ins
Reflection space
Fewer assumptions, more grace
This isn’t weakness.
This is what sustainable leadership looks like.
The Hidden Holiday Struggle
The holidays carry emotional tension:
Joy and grief at the same table
Tradition and absence on the same calendar
Celebration and sorrow in the same room
For many families and professionals I serve, the holidays aren’t just festive—they’re heavy.
And that doesn’t mean anyone is failing.
It means they are human.
The Message My Dad Still Teaches Me
Before my dad passed, he often said:
“Get the book done.”
At the time, I thought he meant the manuscript.
Now I realize he meant the mission.
He believed in this work before I fully believed in myself. Four years later, his voice still echoes in every workshop, every training, every client conversation, and every reader who finds their own story inside this book.
Loss took his presence.
Purpose carries his legacy forward.
Why This Matters for Organizations Right Now
If you lead a:
School
Day program
Disability service organization
Nonprofit
Ministry
Healthcare team
You are leading people who are carrying invisible emotional labor every day.
They are navigating:
Grief
Fatigue
Family stress
Health challenges
Uncertainty
And they are still showing up.
That deserves more than performance strategies.
It deserves humanity.
A Resource for This Season of Grief and Growth
As the holidays approach, I want to gently offer I’MPOSSIBLE JOURNEY as a resource for:
Families
Caregivers
Educators
Program staff
Leaders
And anyone navigating loss
Not as a quick fix.
Not as a motivational slogan.
But as a steady companion for the journey.
👉 [Get your copy or copies here]
If this book helps someone take:
One honest breath
One brave next step
Or feel one degree less alone
That is enough.
Four Years Later…
I still miss my dad every day.
But I also see what his life continues to produce:
Purpose from pain
Hope from hardship
Service from sorrow
And that keeps me walking forward—with gratitude, humility, and deep respect for every person carrying something unseen.
I’m Sam Miller, founder of Dreaming Made Simple, author of I’MPOSSIBLE and I’MPOSSIBLE JOURNEY, and a Maxwell Leadership–certified coach who helps individuals, families, neurodiverse communities, and organizations turn limitations into opportunities. Through workshops, coaching, storytelling, and practical tools, I empower teams and individuals to uncover the treasure in the midst of their challenges and move forward with clarity and confidence.